GRAEME KEETON: BRANDING WRITER & ADVERTISING GUY

I’ve been at the Photoshop today. Happy Easter! https://twitter.com/GraemeKeeton

Mon, 01 Apr 2013 10:15:24 -0400

I’ve been at the Photoshop today. Happy Easter!

Speechless - A hopeful short film

Sun, 01 Jul 2012 12:33:00 -0400

Speechless is a story about the communication between a man and his young daughter, who meet for the first time after living in two very different worlds.

Charles Wise is a British management consultant living in New York. He is hugely successful, with a reputation amongst rival firms as a gifted talker and pitcher. His most valuable asset is his power of persuasion. Having brought in billions of dollars worth of business over the past few years, and having talked his way into bed with almost all of the women he has done business with, he is on top of his game, seemingly untouchable.

However, when his estranged wife dies in an accident, he learns that he is to take custody of the daughter he left almost eight years ago, before she was born, and who he was unaware even existed.

Ellen, who was born completely deaf, knows nothing about her father, other than that he lives in New York, makes a lot of money, and will be taking care of her from now on.

She is independent, and her closest friend is an ageing black Labrador, who has been with the family since before she was born.

Unable to rely on his verbal charm, Charles must find a way to connect with Ellen, or risk losing the one permanent and meaningful person in his life.

If you’d like to discuss Speechless further, get in touch via Twitter.

'Gin & Tonic' A Short Story by Graeme Keeton

Thu, 19 Apr 2012 21:26:48 -0400

‎”When their obsessive mother is killed by a man known as the ‘Painter’, twin geniuses Penny(Gin) and Paisley(Tonic), peer into the past to discover why, using a homemade time projector. What they discover, will profoundly alter their lives beyond anything they could have imagined.”

‘Gin & Tonic’ is my first ever fictional short story, so I’d appreciate some gentle feedback if you have the time to read it. It’s easily doable in one session.

Thanks!

'Gin & Tonic' (Synopsis) A short story.

Sat, 07 Apr 2012 17:04:42 -0400

Even as children, twin sisters Gin and Tonic showed remarkable prowess in almost every aspect of practical and theoretical science. Their understanding of ‘cause and effect’ meant that nothing was ever quite out of reach, no matter how high a shelf it happened to be on. At school they excelled, consistently amazing their teachers, who often took a back seat to some of the pair’s bolder ideas. Classmates never stood a chance when it came to experimental assignments, and it became apparent early on that evaluating the sisters was little more than a formality.

Undoubtedly brilliant, Gin and Tonic were inseparable. Hardly surprising for a pair of twins so obviously gifted, however, they were held together by something altogether more sinister. Their mother, Joni, who at birth had named the girls Penny and Paisley, was a troubled woman who had become estranged from the pair’s father after developing an obsession with serial killer, Raymond Doppler.

Already concerned about their mother’s state of mind, the tension increases after Doppler escapes from prison and begins a relationship with Joni. Sure enough, not long passes before Doppler cannot contain himself any longer. He kills her and then flees, leaving the sisters, now both approaching twenty-one, to deal with their loss and formulate a plan.

Using their immense scientific knowledge, Gin and Tonic devise a unique method of time travel, which allows them to spring backwards in time, before being catapulted back exactly twenty-four hours later. Intent on intercepting Doppler before he reaches their mother, they inadvertently overshoot on their first attempt, witnessing a previously unknown event involving both their mother and Doppler, that will alter their entire perspective and the actions they take thereafter.

Main Characters:

Penny ‘Gin’ Hart

Paisley ‘Tonic’ Hart

Joni Hart

Raymond Doppler

Been a while since I’ve posted anything, but there’s...

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 19:53:15 -0400

Been a while since I’ve posted anything, but there’s been a lot going on.

Check out my latest article at the Huffington Post and the photos from my trip to France the other week.

How the devil are you, anyway?

(As always, nothing to do with Heineken. Views are my own.)

The Rosie hospital in Cambridge is expanding! This much-loved...

Sat, 03 Mar 2012 20:03:00 -0500

The Rosie hospital in Cambridge is expanding! This much-loved women’s health and maternity unit is undergoing some incredibly exciting changes, as the whole biomedical campus around Addenbrooke’s doubles in size to accommodate and provide even better care for patients.

The care available and the work being done at Cambridge’s university hospitals is some of the best in the world, and now you have the chance to be a genuinely important part of it.

Visit the website and find out how you can help the Addenbrooke’s Charitable Trust turn the Rosie into something even more special for the UK’s annual 750,000 newborns.

Live in Cambridge? Talk to me.

I can find pretty much no information on the Levi’s Blue...

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 17:12:22 -0500

I can find pretty much no information on the Levi’s Blue line, but I bought a pair a couple of years ago. Anyone know what happened?

Photo

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 17:08:50 -0500

I mentioned a while ago that I got the chance to use a really...

Sun, 26 Feb 2012 18:22:00 -0500

I mentioned a while ago that I got the chance to use a really cool camera-mounted microscope whilst shooting this Levi’s project. The depth of field viewable down the scope was so shallow, and each fibre was magnified maybe twenty or thirty times.

It looked amazing, and in between the specks and the natural vignette, I ended up with around a hundred possibilities for the final pieces. Here are just two, each with a little bit of fairly useless information underneath.

If you’re not already following me on HuffPost, then check it out.

Here’s my second article for The Huffington Post; an...

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 15:15:00 -0500

Here’s my second article for The Huffington Post; an introduction to advertising, agencies, and the Ben & Jerry’s of advertising, Wieden + Kennedy.

Picture is partially related. I just wanted to make a little HuffPost ad.

Your thoughts to me on Twitter?

'Wildlife Welfare: What's in it for Me?'

Tue, 21 Feb 2012 10:41:00 -0500

“The lumpy bumpy appearance of those lumbering Humpbacks is no accident, as the hydroelectricity and wind farming industries found out when they added similar bumps to their array of turbines.”

Read the rest of my first article for The Huffington Post here.

I’d love your thoughts, too, as always.

I have done the research, and have reason to believe that Apps...

Sat, 11 Feb 2012 19:24:15 -0500

I have done the research, and have reason to believe that Apps like Foursquare, are indeed relevant to SEO. So, if you’re a small business owner looking to improve your Google ranking, why not give this a go?

Two birds. One stone.

(You can thank me on Twitter!)

'Quality Control: Classy Content.'

Fri, 10 Feb 2012 09:44:54 -0500

Search Engine Optimisation isn’t some devious practice imposed by a search engine (let’s call it “Google”) to prevent you from achieving your goals or doing business. What it is - aside from being quite good fun – is a fair and logical system that ranks web pages accordingly, when a user searches for a certain set of keywords. Where you appear in those rankings depends on a wide variety of things, including: how effectively you use paid advertising like Google AdWords; how well you promote yourself using social media (not spamming), and of course, how relevant your product is to the user’s query.

However, perhaps the most fundamental factor in determining where in the organic rankings Google decides to put you, is the quality of your content. The content, the text, the copy, the stuff on your website, needs to strike the perfect balance between Googlebot and User readability. The point that I’ll be making, is that writing and designing purely for web optimisation, is fine if your customer is a fictitious search engine robot. Otherwise, concentrate on your user experience, be engaging, be passionate and those all important keywords and phrases will present themselves naturally, or “organically” as Google prefers.

Effective use of unique title tags and descriptive meta tags are absolutely crucial, no doubt, they are the refining tools of optimisation, and using them correctly is an art unto itself. Nevertheless, it all starts with great content. Stirring titles and keyword-saturated meta tags that lead to poor, or vacant content are about as useful as an expensive pair of headphones without a stereo.

Remember, Google will do its best to get users to your website with the information and content that you provide. It can do nothing to keep them there. That part is up to you.

What is good content?

That depends on your intended user and what you’re trying to sell, but, generally, good content:

Is consistent, both in terms of the quality of grammar and the tone of voice.
Relevant in its conveyance of the right information, in the right amount.
Engaging: Whilst remaining relevant, allowing your personality to show is often great. People like to know they’re dealing with a real individual. They remember stories, too.

Bad content?

Poor spelling and generally bad grammar.
Obvious overuse of “keywords” in an attempt to boost rankings. It stands out, and is often just confusing. People will see it and leave.
T.M.I – Right?

So, how do you produce better content? If you’re at least a semi-accomplished writer, then just spend a little time really expressing your service in a way that would make you want to use it. Vary your language to attract older and younger generations of users to your site. I mentioned tone of voice, as well, and that’s important. Users should be able to absorb your text content in the same way they would, had it been spoken to them. If you’re not sure they will, read it out loud. If you’re still not sure, employ a professional copywriter. Either way, and as the old saying goes: “Take care of the pennies, and the pounds will take care of themselves.”

Follow me on Twitter.

‘Give Blood.’ According to economist Dambisa Moyo,...

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:05:00 -0500

‘Give Blood.’

According to economist Dambisa Moyo, our richest countries, have, over the past 60 years sent over $1 trillion dollars (£630bn+) of aid to Africa. That’s a lot of money, and there is continued debate as to whether this amount of amount of funding, and the way that it is used, helps, or actually does more harm than good. Moyo says it harms. She wrote a book* about it, too.

Resultantly, whilst instinctively I see any aid as good aid, I also find myself seduced by Moyo’s logic. I think I understand, but honestly, it is probably only in the same way that I do when top-level scientists dumb down quantum mechanics on television to make it accessible to we simpletons. I have an inkling that the Universe might actually be fathomable, because the BBC made a graphic about it, but it isn’t.

So, if like me, you are socially aware but ultimately quite overwhelmed by these big ideas, then you might be wondering if there is anything that you can get involved with, that is both profound and manageable. Something that you can do on your own (if you like), in your own time and repeat, for free. There is such a thing.

You can give blood.

Since September 2011, blood stocks in the UK dropped steadily until January 2012, when, encouragingly, they began to recover. That is no reason, however, to become complacent. As anyone who knows about the power of groups will tell you, this period of collaborative effort is the ideal time to get out there and donate.

I wonder, what your immediate thoughts are when you think of how donated blood is used. Accidents? Stabbings and shootings? Generally violent, massive blood loss, right? True, whole blood can be used in those and many other situations, but consider this: How many people do you think there are receiving chemotherapy in the UK right now? What about those recovering from an organ transplant? Hundreds of thousands of babies are born each year in Britain, and not all of them without a hitch. Separated blood – that is, plasma, platelets and red cells – is used for these and an array of other purposes, every single day. Donations have begun to increase again, but it is still not enough.

For 15 minutes of your time, and a little under a pint of blood, you can save someone else’s life.

This does not require an institution. You do not need to join a society. You do not require any specialised skills. The organisational factors involved, are limited only to your ability to self-manage to the point of filling out your details and going to a donation centre. That is it.

There is no question like, “How many other people will do this to make it worth my while?”

It does not matter. Others will do it, if and when they want to. You can do it now. So why don’t you? Visit the website, register, and give blood.

*Dambisa Moyo’s book

(I am not affiliated with Give Blood UK. As always, I’d love your thoughts.)

'More Like Fractals'

Wed, 01 Feb 2012 17:09:00 -0500

I like analogies. They make an idea easier to explain, since now, you have doubled the chances that your audience will find something that they understand. Analogies also provide another, consequential benefit in the sense that, because you are constantly comparing two like ideas, in the end, you wind up with a better understanding of both – not just the original point.

The reason I believe they work so well and so often, is simply that people like familiarity. If an unfamiliar idea can be paired with some part of our existing knowledge, then naturally, we are going to feel much more confident about taking on new information. Of course, we should all try and get out of our comfort zones every now and then, but when the objective is purely to understand a new idea, then analogies are the way to go.

‘Fractal branding’

Fractals occur in nature all the time, in snowflakes, lightning and even foods like broccoli. In essence, a fractal object is described as being recognisable in shape and construction, whatever the scale.

Trees, for example, are fractals. A trunk extends large branches, which then stem twigs, that in turn sprout smaller twigs. From the whole to the close-up, the structure of the tree is constant and recognisable. Painter Jackson Pollock’s works are fractals. A BBC documentary a while ago showed this, when attempting to explain why it was so surprisingly difficult to replicate them. It was only after removing the human element of rigidity and the stern determination to copy Pollock’s paintings, that they began to see any similarity.

Successful brands are built this way, too.

I speak only from my experience as a photographer, both employed and freelance, but whatever your field the principles are the same. Your brand is not limited to your product, service or logo. It is everything. Before, during and after. The way you dress when you meet clients, and even the quality of your business cards, are all equally important steps in gaining and keeping valuable people. If one part fails, it is likely that sooner or later, so will the rest. If you continually use foul language on Twitter, clients will notice, and will gradually disappear.

As a frequent freelance photographer, I have to be sure that every person involved in a shoot is happy. I do this simply by talking to them, asking questions and listening with a genuine interest. My business cards have a shimmer effect on them, just so that I have something small and fun to talk about with whoever I give them to.

These kinds of things might seem a little trivial, but they are really not. In fact, if you are a freelancer, then the more thoughtful your subtle actions are, the better. Make follow-up calls just to say “Hi”, and people will want to use you again and again.

The product is the product, the brand is you.

Tell me some of your favourite analogies.

Here’s a look at the inside page of one of my many beloved...

Wed, 01 Feb 2012 16:52:00 -0500

Here’s a look at the inside page of one of my many beloved Moleskine books.

Got a Moleskine? How’s your handwriting?

Do you have pets? Are they vaccinated? They should be. These...

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:54:00 -0500

Do you have pets? Are they vaccinated?

They should be.

These are non-official ads for Intervet, but your local vets will do just the same. It’s not just newborns that need protecting, either.

Do the right thing.

'Positively Local'

Mon, 30 Jan 2012 17:40:00 -0500

‘Positively Local.’

On Friday, January 27^th 2012 at shortly before 18:40pm, I got on the London King’s Cross train from King’s Lynn. On my way to see friends in the Fenland town of March, I had made this journey countless times before, expecting to arrive in Ely at around 19:10pm with a few minutes spare to cross platforms and catch the connecting train for the rest of my journey. Only this time, there was a slight problem.

Such is life, my train arrived at Ely two minutes late, due to speed restrictions en route. Of course, in the grand old scheme of things, none of this matters all that much, but it mattered enough for me to see my connecting service, loading up and pulling away, just as we arrived.

I was on the phone at the time, informing said friends that I was going to be late – not knowing when the next train would be. I hung up, and as we began to exit, in front of me was a man who had overheard my apologies and subsequent frustration. In true English fashion, we both raised eyebrows and made similar disparaging gestures in the general direction of our now-departed train.

Heading now for the overhead screens, we scoured the timetable looking for the next available service. Having failed to find one, and apparently now in this together, we made our way to the ticket office to ask.

“Quater-past eight.” Said the man in the ticket office. It was only quarter-past seven.

We walked back outside onto the platform, and we bought coffee (specifically, he bought us both coffee.)

An older gentleman, close to retirement age, he was smartly dressed underneath a company overcoat. He was straight-spoken and from his demeanour it was clear that he was no stranger to hard work. Already in a thinking mood, I asked him whether he worked in King’s Lynn, and what he thought of the town centre at present. The conversation that followed was profound to me, although it was not all that surprising.

(Sir, if you are reading this, forgive my paraphrasing of our conversation.)

This man lived in March with his wife. He had three children, and, like me, he had noticed the steady emptying of establishments around King’s Lynn town centre. Shops open, shops close, they remain vacant for a while and then the process repeats itself. In the interest of honesty and still relatively annoyed about missing my train, I suggested that the problem was a matter of perception.

Go into King’s Lynn town centre on any given weekday, and it seems as though we have come to accept a few empty shops. Our lack of branded stores, the likes of which grace Cambridge and Norwich, seems fairly normal. I find this to be a little unsettling, and so, cold and opinionated, I began to relay to him my honest thoughts, and my solution.

As a general guide, when you expect less, of yourself and of others, most of the time you will get less. Demand more of your officials. Form petitions and insist that certain kinds of services, chosen by you, make their way into our town centre. If your neighbour runs a cake making business from their kitchen, but you think that, with the right support, they would thrive in a little shop on the high street, then help them. If you want to shop at H&M here, instead of online or in Cambridge, encourage those in power to make enquiries. Write to the companies themselves, along with others, and make your voices heard.

Then, once the places that you have worked so hard to bring in arrive, use them. If you want them to stay, you have to use them. It is a cyclical process, but the old adage is true: “You have to spend money to make money.”

Assured by my new friend that my plan was not entirely naïve, we went on to discuss the automation process of self-service and social media. He explained to me the self check-in system now available when you drop your car off for a service at certain garages.

“You drive up, enter your registration details, drop the keys through a hatch, and off they go.”

He was amazed, and somewhat disappointed. There were probably around 40 years between us in age (still are, in fact), so I grew up with this kind of stuff, but I too, found myself a little disappointed. Not directly at the triumph of publicly integrated technology, touch screens, automation or anything else. I have a smart phone, I use it all the time. The point he was making, was that these processes, whilst incredible in their own right, should ideally be used to modernise our experiences with others, not replace them.

We all have ideas, and we all wish that others would take notice of them. How many times, though, have you actually voiced them to someone who might be able to make them materialise? An angry Facebook status is a start, but if you really want to make a change to this place that you live in, talk to someone. Talk to other people about your ideas, because I promise you, they are not as crazy as you might think. The people, or the ideas.

If you are not already doing so, then start doing what you love. Start talking to the people you meet, and start expecting more.

In the end, our 20:15 train was delayed by, you guessed it, two minutes. Fitting symmetry, I suppose, but honestly, by that point I really did not care. We boarded, took our seats and 15 minutes later arrived in March. I shook his hand, and when I asked him if he was likely to get in trouble for being late, he laughed and said, “I’m always in trouble!”

Thoughts?

‘Solar Insurance’ In light of today’s solar...

Tue, 24 Jan 2012 18:19:51 -0500

‘Solar Insurance’

In light of today’s solar activity, that played minor havoc with some of our electrical stuff, here’s a new poster for solar insurance.

I’ll edit this soon with some hilarious commentary about what’s covered and what isn’t.

Anyone who gets why it’s £8.19 is a nerd.

I was reading the Huffington Post today and came across this in...

Mon, 23 Jan 2012 18:33:00 -0500

I was reading the Huffington Post today and came across this in the Culture section; blockbuster films, with their posters redesigned by illustrator Sean Hartter. He casts -amongst others- Clint Eastwood as ‘Wolverine’, Sean Connery in ‘The Fifth Element’ and Vincent Price in ‘Ghostbusters’.

They’re super cool and looked like a lot of fun to make. Naturally, I had a go myself. Here’s Clark Gable as ‘The Amazing Iron Man’.

Check out Sean Hartter, too.